I was married 50 years ago and divorced 35 years ago. I married young and neither my husband or I received any guidance. We both came from unhappy families. He was seeking a sexual partner. I was seeking security. We were both woefully ignorant in terms of what marriage is about and had no example to guide us. I have two sons and therefore have no wish to annul my marriage which to me is effectively to deny that I have a family. The ‘church’ was unable to provide me with any support when I was broken by my failure to have a successful marriage. I won’t comment on one priest’s response which was ‘inappropriate’ to say the least. I do not feel sinful. Rather I feel that I failed in a very difficult situation. ‘Mercy’ (or ‘forgiveness’) is not an appropriate response to my predicament. Rather I feel unable to forgive myself for failing my children, though I have now accepted the situation. Thankfully I have lovely grandchildren who are part of my family I have not remarried,, not through choice – the opportunity just never arose (Thank you God!) I am happy to be alone now because I would not like to have the same extremely painful and lonely experience again., though it would have been good to find out that I could make a good relationship!
I do not understand why priests who are unable to keep their vows are treated differently to me – their fellow priests wish them happiness. is this all about ‘having sex’? Priests haven’t yet (perhaps) but we have had sex and should not have another chance at sexual happiness? Can the church fathers understand that sex is NOT our major preoccupation?
If someone desires to come to the Church and receive the sacrament of Communion, who, but God, can turn someone away???? The Church should open the door to welcome people in, not close the door to keep people out – a wise monsignor told me that many years ago.
I am not divorced, but I was raised Episcopalian. Many years ago, I married my Catholic husband. As a boy, he had been an altar server for the priest who performed the ceremony. Several years later, when our second child received the sacrament of First Communion, the parish priest, who was a Monsignor, encouraged me to take communion in the church, every Sunday. After several more years of receiving communion in the church, and raising our children as Catholics, I became a Catholic and was confirmed in the church. That wise and caring Monsignor said that his job was to OPEN THE DOORS AND WELCOME PEOPLE IN, NOT CLOSE THE DOORS AND KEEP PEOPLE OUT. Because of him, I stayed with the church, and became a Catholic. Divorced and remarried Catholics should have the same choice.
My comment would be “what would Jesus do”? The Church has elbowed out many good people. Instead of accompanying them on their journey they have failed any support. I am a faithful Catholic and have been fortunate to belong to parishes where priests had empathy for their flock, but this is not universal in the church, hence we choose to find parishes with priests that can feed our faith, that can help us with our struggles in life, not add to them by being stringent and judgmental. I definitely feel that divorced and remarried people should be allowed to participate in the Eucharist.{jcomments on}
Come teologo ex cattolico, vorrei solo evidenziare che nella Bibbia la “Misericordia” è al centro del piano divino; quindi la Chiesa cattolica, dovrebbe a mio avviso, svolgere il suo ruolo naturale che le ha dato lo Spirito Santo, cioè quello di essere Madre!
V.M.R. Chianese{jcomments on}
So many of my good friends feel excluded and need to be nourished and affirmed by receiving Christ in the Eucharist – they need mercy not judgment.{jcomments on}